There Are No Words

My Little Ponies At The Movies

I remember My Little Ponies. Well, I remember the phenomenon. I never watched the show or collected the toys and I hadn't thought about the whole thing for years. Then I saw these videos of movie trailers edited with bits and pieces from the cartoon. It's true this is all quite brilliant but what it's really done is made me think I want to watch My Little Ponies. This show looks so fucked up.


WATCHMEN



INGLORIOUS BASTARDS



300



THE DARK KNIGHT

Star Wars Saga Told In 5 Minutes With Legos

Yep, this pretty much kicks ass. The prequel section is way better than the actual prequels, go figure.

EPISODE I-III



EPISODE IV-VI

Meredith Viera Sucks

Apparently the Today show is running out of things to over-pay their "news anchors" to do so they've turned their attention to fucking things up overseas. Meredith Viera went to England to visit the set of Doctor Who. I should have known this was going to suck when the text for the segment read Dr. Who. I don't know what's more offensive, the fact that she has no clue what the show is or that she treats it like its some kind of new trend.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Game Over Man, Game Over....But Party ON!!

I like things that come out of nowhere and make no sense. Take this disco version of the Alien theme from Ridley Scott's epic film. Nothing really here to set up, just enjoy the shit out of it.

Existensial Star Wars....In French

Brilliant doesn't even begin to cover this. Thanks to the folks over at Topless Robot for this incredible video.

Ok, This Kind Of Amps Me For The Avengers

As anybody knows I am not a fan of the upcoming Avengers movie. I think Chris Evans is a horrible choice for Captain America, I'm not 100% sold on the Thor movie and I've never thought Iron Man was any great shakes. That being said, this fan trailer pumps me up for what the Avengers movie could be but probably won't.

GOD OF WAR!!!!---The Indie Film?

Here's another awesome video from the guys who did the Legend Of Zelda as a John Hughes movie. This is Gods Of War as if it was a Wes Anderson indie film. Again, these guys nail it and I'm not even a gamer.

The Miracles Vs Metallica

JOY DIVISION VIA PLAY MOBILE

A Captain America Movie I Might Actually See

Um....So.....Uh....Yeah.

I have no idea what to say, there are really no words.

FUCK THE GREEN LANTERN MOVIE

This should clear up the idea anybody had that this movie wouldn't suck huge, entire, stinking ass. This trailer pisses me the fuck off because ti effectively kills the idea that we'll ever have a decent Green Lantern movie.

I hate everything

TRON CLIP MAKES ME NERVOUS

Now I'm not saying this has me totally freaked out but it does force me to stop and pause my insane giggly excitement over the film. Check this out first.


TRON: Legacy Exclusive Clip - Sirens Dress Sam



I have a few issues with this clip. First of all, why would there be a place to dispose of clothing? Really, why would their be a place to dispose of anything? Computer programs don't eat, drink, shit or do anything else that requires disposal. Second, why do the girls have make up and hairstyle? Why make them sexy? They're programs? The original Tron made everybody look the same, even the woman, because they were programs, not people. The only reason they had any human characteristics was to give the idea that programs too the personality of those who designed them.

This clip makes me think that Tron Legacy might make the computer world too hip and sexy, too human. If the Hollywood idiots have decided to glamorize and sexualize what is supposed to be the inside world of computers, that might suck. The only way I could see to make it work is if Flynn being there has done something or if the information age has somehow enhanced a computer programs understanding of what humanity is.

Either way the four chicks walking backwards like that is stupid.

HOMELESS DOUBLE KERMITS PERFORM UNDER PRESSURE

I have no idea if this guy is really homeless or a performance artist but this is very cool and oddly touching.

THROBBING GRISTLE VIDEO PROMO

The worst thing about this video is I won't be able to get to Europe to see them

THROBBING GRISTLE PROMO 2010 from Industrial Records on Vimeo.

Like OMG CTHULHU Is Like Totally Fucking Hot Bitches

I don't know who the guys who put this together are but it's pretty funny and anything having to do with Cthulhu is awesome to me. The best part is hearing the story recited by the kind of person I'd want the Old Ones to awaken and stop the fuck out of existence. Dig it.

Anyone Else Been On The When Harry Met Sally Ride?

I don't know where this sling shot ride is but if you recognize it don't take your lady there unless you're supercock 13" and aren't afraid of a giant machine making your girl realize what she's been missing. Then again this chick could be such a slut it takes a whole machine to make her come or she's faking. Either way it's hysterical.



I love that her boyfriend said "Are you serious" and that this chick confesses the sling shot orgasm beats his all to hell. The line for this thing must be around the block.

AND NOW FOR NO REASON: MC ESCHER PANORAMA AND WINNIE THE HULK

Yep I love the times when And Now For No Reason needs no introduction. First up here's a very cool MC Escher panorama


Tribute to Escher in Barcelona

AND from there we go to a Winnie The Hulk comic, which kinda rules!!

THE GATHERING OF THE JUGGALOS--Truth Vs Fiction

So every year the most untalented shmucks in music The Insane Clown Posse have some big blow out show called The Gathering where all their fans, called Juggalos, hang out and get high and praise not just ICP but all the shit acts within their family. This year is the 11th Annual Gathering and the worst part of it is that Redman and Method Man have somehow been tricked into performing. To celebrate and promote the Gathering a seventeen minute infomercial has been put together and it inspired me to do a little truth vs fiction concept.

In their fictional world the Gathering is some mecca for underground music, where the best go to perform to kids who are there to absorb all kinds of experiences. That simply isn't the case, not at all. The only real reason to go is to maybe talk some decent girl with low self esteem into fucking you in clown paint or at least she'll stay awake long enough to blow you before passing out crying about how her dad hits her.

Think I'm wrong, watch the infomercial and then watch this video put together of actual Juggalos at an actual Gathering. The infomercial is long so once you have the point skip to the next video.

INFOMERCIAL:



NOW HERE'S VIDEOS OF ACTUAL JUGGALOS.



See the longer I examine the Juggalos and the Gathering the less I hate it and the more I see it as some kind of bizarre study. If this was performance art it would be brilliant, the fact that it's serious is sad. Don't forget the ICP preform this song with NO SENSE OF IRONY.