Look I get it, I understand, I "feel you" or whatever other stupid parlance of our time you want to throw at me. Marketing is here to stay, it won't go anywhere it's like AIDS/SWINE FLU/GONORRHEA times 10, I get that. Toys, t-shirts, posters, tie in comics, novels, etc, that all sucks the soul out of a movie but I get why they need to do it. My issue comes when the marketing people aren't put on a tight leash when it comes to products. Here's what I'm talking about. Two event movies this year is abysmal-but-lucrative Wolverine movie and the unreleased-but-I-have-faith live action Where The Wild Things Are movie. Both are going to have tie ins but it seems one knows how to do this and one doesn't. Here's the Where The Wild Thing Are tie in.
See, toys, and cool toys. Kind of hip, a little pretentious, they're PERFECT and they don't reach through the anus of the legacy of the film and tear its soul out.
Yeah I have no words for this either. If you can't tell what it is this the Wolverine Golf Club cover. Seriously? I mean..yeah seriously? What the fuck does GOLF have to do with Wolverine on any level. It's not even like the stupid Wolverine Latte machine or X-TREME PIZZA bullshit, this is stupid on a much deeper level. The worst is that MARVEL approved this hunk of shit. As I sit here seeing this in all of its stupefying glory I came up with some other movie tie ins.
DARK KNIGHT KITTY LITTER
SPIDER-MAN ALL PURPOSE BLEACH
X-MEN WOOD POLISH AND STAIN REMOVER
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES DRIVING GLOVES
SUPERMAN HEAVY DUTY SHELF HINGES
PUNISHER VIOLIN BOW ROSIN
OK marketing guys, have it, just remember to send me my check.